If you’re going to deliberately cruise and walk slow as hell during the busiest time of the day, then move to the side. After all, there are other people who wish to get to where the fuck they’re going in a timely manner.
You want to play on your mobile phone and walk in traffic at the same time? Really? Right now? Well don’t. Put that shit away, look up, and watch where the hell you’re walking like everyone else.
If you’re lost and unsure of where you’re going, just get the fuck out of the middle of the passageway, move to the side, and let the people that know where the fuck they’re going pass through.
If you see me and you’re in awe because of my complexion, don’t whisper about me, point at me, laugh at me, or shout out ‘Hello’ in the most whimsical tone. I’m a fucking human being, just nod and smile. By the way, don’t sneak and take my picture either.
If you bump into me, don’t forget to say sorry or excuse me. I don’t care if we don’t speak the same language, just say something or do anything to acknowledge that you were in the wrong.
If you feel the need to sneeze or burp, cover your fucking mouth, period.
If you’ve got an important phone call to make, please, quiet the fuck down. I’m pretty sure everybody in the vicinity gives zero-fucks about your conversation. And no one wants to hear you shouting on the phone.
If you want to watch videos on your phone, go ahead, BUT, pull out your earphones. Don’t be a fucking asshole and put the volume on full blast. Seriously, do you even give a fuck about the people around you?
Fuck it. Let’s just go ahead and call these ‘life-saving’ skills. They may not be serious to you, but trust me, dedicate your life to these guidelines and you’re guaranteed to keep someone away from a mental asylum. That is all. Thank you.